On her way to pole dancing class, Jolie listened to the song that she and GodsWatch both liked. It was a nightcore version of a song called ‘Heather’, by The Bandits.
As she sat on the bus, while it took its usual route through town, she looked at the buildings outside the window. The song added a certain effect to the view of the passing by scenery.
People inside of their apartments were living their life, and Jolie saw that from the bus, through their windows.
Pieces of glass was all that separated them from her, but with GodsWatch, it was so much more than that. From him, she was separated by a physical distance and an ocean that was miles deeper than the thin glass, but equally invisible, in the right circumstances.
During pole class, she learned a new trick, called butterfly, but it wasn’t about butterflies she thought while looking at herself in the mirror and adjusting the weight of her body. It was GodsWatch.
During university lectures — the ones she went to — it wasn’t the professor’s words that echoed in her mind, but all of her conversations with GodsWatch.
When talking to her friend, it wasn’t their discussions about assignments and cafés that interested her — it was the thought of going to cafés with GodsWatch, and doing assignments while cuddling.
Whatever she did, at any point, it was related to him. Only her dreams had yet to be saturated with his presence, but she figured it wouldn’t take too long until her unconscious mind caught on. There was always a certain delay with dreams.
Speaking of delays, it was something that she could no longer do, when it came to marrying her account in LoS.
It had been weeks since Spear left, and her wedding ring was feeling the effects.
From rank 11 in the lover ranking, she had fallen to number 15, all because Spear wasn’t there to add his daily intimacy to the ring.
Yuna seemed to have quit, but she was still at rank 3, as was Bone. They were symmetrical, unlike her and GodsWatch, who was at rank 2. Rank 1 was Rotervin, his lover.
“I need to get married,” she wrote in the world chat, “asap.”
It seemed like Dusker wasn’t there, as he didn’t comment, not did he send her a PM.
Zenflood didn’t say anything, either.
“God,” she said, “are you there?”
“a bit,” he said.
So he was there, but ignored her marriage comment? Deep down in her soul, she knew that she was doomed. So why did she go on? Stupidity? Probably.
“I need to get married,” she said, “Should I marry Dusker?”
“Idk, do you want to?”
He didn’t mind her marrying Dusker? Well, then, maybe she should.
Sourly, she said, “Idk.”
“Welp, I’m going to see a movie.” he said, and left.
She tried again the next day, and the day after that, until finally, she worked up the courage to ask him directly:
“God,” she said in her chatcord room, “If we get married and you come to SS, you can be the guild leader when Dusker quits.”
“If he quits,” said GodsWatch.
“Well, I mean, he wants to marry me, so don’t you think he might quit if we get married?”
She was aware of the fact that her logic was weak and faulty, but it was all she had.
“Idk,” he said, “but I like BBF.”
What could there possibly be to like in there?”
“Because, my friends are there.”
Then what was she? A stranger?
“But I’m in SS.”
Just face it, Jolie, he doesn’t want you. Even if you try to talk him into marriage, he still won’t want you. Give up, it’s pointless. Indeed, she should just go and hold onto Dusker’s proposal. Why push it with GodsWatch?
But sometimes, Jolie was like a cockroach — against her own will. And that’s why she kept trying.
One day in late March, she made the suggestion again, during Heavenly Boss,
“If you become the guild leader, you’ll get more bp,” she said, “and then you can beat Curry.”
“Yeah, but,” he said.
So reluctant, huh? Why? Because she was an old hag with no desirable traits whatsoever? That must be it. It was definitely it. He would never find her desirable, not even in ten years — especially not in ten years.
But one day, out of the blue, he changed his mind, and agreed to marry her.
“Ok,” he said, during the second Heavenly Boss of March 30, “I’ll marry you.”
“You will?” she couldn’t help but be surprised.
“I’ll move to SS tomorrow,” he promised.
However, things didn’t turn out the way they planned…
The next day, when Jolie logged into her account, happily anticipating her marriage to GodsWatch, she was faced with a shocking truth, that would come to change everything.
RapidJudge was no longer in BBF, but in SS. He had switched guild.
“What’s this about?” she asked GodsWatch when he logged in, and he said,
“Idk, but I can’t log into Rapid’s account anymore.”
“Dusker must’ve changed the pw,” he said, “since Rapid let him have the account on his email.”
He continued, “even though he was going to give it to me when he quit for real.”
What a bastard.
“Yeah, we were talking about it last week, but now that Dusker has stolen it…”
“But can’t you talk to Rapid about getting it back?” she asked.
“Umm, well,” he said, “I wouldn’t think Dusker would give it back, and if he changed the password…”
Jolie filled in, “… he’s the only one who has access to the account. I see.”
Now what? GodsWatch couldn’t become the guild leader now, even if Dusker quit, because RapidJudge had more than double his battle power.
“So, are you still going to move to SS?” she asked.
“Idk,” he said, and that was the moment when Jolie learned that the only reason he had agreed to marry her in the first place, was the guild leader position. Beating Curry was important to him, battle power was important to him, but Jolie, she was just a means to get there.
“Ok,” she said, “I see.”
With tears threatening to flow from her eyes, she closed the game tab and lay down on her bed.
It was her fault that she had gotten into this situation. She could’ve stopped, she could’ve prevented herself from getting in this deep. Why didn’t she? Why did she keep wading into the water until it was so deep that she had to swim, even though she knew that she’d get cramps, and eventually sink?
Over the following days, she only logged in to do her dailies, then logged right back out.
She checked chatcord every now and then, and saw messages from John, asking about her. Nothing from GodsWatch. Until…
“Are you ok?” came a sudden message, on the 3rd of April, in her room.
GodsWatch was asking about her? He actually cared about her existence?
“Why?” she asked.
“Well, you haven’t been on for days, so.”
At least he noticed, but that didn’t mean that he saw her as more than a means to get bp, or even potential nudes.
“Idk,” she said, “I’m sad.”
She didn’t want to say.
“Did something happen?”
He really was clueless. She found it hard to blame him, but needed someone to blame, and so she put it on herself, making her feel even more miserable.
“I’m fine,” she said, “just bored of the game.”
Would he be sad if she quit? Well, if she did, who would he try to get nudes from, or play truth or dare with?
“What?” she asked.
“By the way, Dusker has been asking for you.”
“So? You want me to marry him in Rapid’s account?”
Well, it didn’t matter what he wanted. She was going to do it either way.
It was her original goal, after all, marrying an OP player. For GodsWatch, she had set it aside, but now that he had rejected her, she had no reason to hold back. Dreamy was going to be the wife of RapidJudge, the top player.
And so, she returned to the game, where she was met with questions from John,
“Dreamy, where have you been?” he asked, “We have missed you.”
Of course they had. But what did they know about her? To the people in this game, Dreamy was just a cute girl, and a fantasy. She wasn’t real, but she wanted to be.
“Thinking,” she said, “I’m marrying Rapid.”
“What? Really? What about GodsWatch?”
“He rejected me.”
“Oh, I see, sorry.”
As if you’re sorry about it. You’re probably celebrating behind my back.
BBF was no longer the strongest guild. In an instant, SS had taken over that spot, and all was because of Dreamy.
Lantos commented in the world chat,
“Wow, to think how much one girl can change the balance of a server.”
That phrase would come to get stuck in Jolie’s mind for ages to come. She changed the server. She had the power to do so, even if other areas of her life were characterized by weakness.
Two people had moved guilds because of Dreamy, but what difference did it make? None of those were who she wanted.
She wrote another poem:
“They’re not the ones”
They’re not the ones
Not the ones I want to see
Not the ones who birth my smile
They’re not the ones
Not the ones who wake my words
Not the ones for my embrace
They’re not the ones
Not the ones that pump my heart
Not the ones that own my call
They’re not the ones
Not the ones, not one bit right
Not the ones who drive me mad
They’re not the ones
Not the ones who make me sad
Not the ones that I stay up for
They’re not the ones
Not the ones I like so much
Not the ones ’cause they’re not you
How could she face this reality, in which what she wanted, could never be hers?
Yes, a while ago marrying a top player had been her ultimate desire, but now that she finally could, it wasn’t what she wanted. Shame on those who called her a gold digger.
Dusker logged into the game a bit after 12 AM, during Lucifer’s Inferno. He often logged in late, as a result of odd work hours, he had told her.
“Hi, Sweetie,” he said to her in one of his regular PMs.
“Hi,” she winked, with zero feelings embedded.
“So, you will marry Rapid?”
She sighed, “Yes. You win.”
This was an alternate ending to the Beauty and the Beast — one in which Gaston won. In other words, reality. Who said that the internet wasn’t the real world? This bitterness was nothing but real. There was no part of it that was like a fantasy, and the result was exactly that which you may expect in real life.
Of course, seen from another perspective, one could compare it to a minor employee marrying a CEO, which was a typical drama scenario, but in this one, there was reluctance involved.
In dramas, there was love, like the one she had for GodsWatch, and maybe the universe had mixed things up? Perhaps the fact that the two love rivals used the same, almighty character, caused a disturbance in the strings of fate?
Maybe it was all tangled up now, and the universe didn’t know what was what, and thus supporting Dusker, without trying to untangle the mess?
Indeed, that must be it.
Jolie wasn’t even Belle, in all honesty. She wasn’t pure and kind — she was mean and evil. Or at least, that’s what she had grown up being told. As for the truth, no one knew. Not even Jolie herself.
In the scenario of fiction, she wasn’t the main character. She was a side character, or, at most, the mean girl.
GodsWatch would eventually find someone for him, but that wasn’t Jolie. And Jolie would end up spending her life alone, after all, until she was old enough to be a cougar.
Well, that wasn’t bad. Being a cougar seemed fun. She could forget about the 15 year old who was daring enough to break her 22 year old, fragile heart. Maybe. Possibly. Unlikely.
In her room in chatcord, GodsWatch sent her a baby bottle. Why? Why play with her heart. Don’t be so impossible to read, just pick like or not like! Stop sending mixed signals!
But she was happy to hear from him, regardless.
“hi,” she said, “I’m about to marry Rapid.”
“Hi,” he responded, “ok.”
Indeed, why would he have anything against it? Her last bit of hope dissipated.
“Are you coming to our wedding?” she asked.
She knew that he was only coming for the guest rewards, which was gold, varying in amount depending on how actively one participated.
The next day, at 9 PM, was the wedding.
Jolie and Dusker had decided to do it in the shrine of Vega and Altair, in Milky Way Town.
The guests were plenty, as far as this server went. Even Curry participated, but Zenflood stayed out.
A while ago, Jolie would’ve wondered if Zen skipped the wedding because he wanted to marry Dreamy, but now, she didn’t care. All she cared about was the fact that GodsWatch stood next to the statue of a coyote, instead of next to her, in front of the statues of Vega and Altair.
Dreamy wore a light pink wedding dress, and Rapid wore a tuxedo. All of the guests wore suits.
Mina was the maid of honour, and she actually arrived, to Jolie’s surprise. The best man was, of course, Duskerbeat. He played both his accounts.
It stung to know that Duskerbeat had won, and that GodsWatch didn’t mind. It pierced her heart to see him standing there in the crowd, not making a single objection.
Marriage in the game wasn’t so complicated. They didn’t need to do any vows or say ‘I do’; all they needed to do was having one of them send a marriage request, which the other one could then agree or decline to, upon which point 100 diamonds were spent from the sender’s account for the wedding rings, and the two were married.
After less than five minutes of wedding, Dreamy was married to Rapid. The guests applauded, then disappeared, one by one. GodsWatch was one of the first to vanish.
From the guests, Dreamy received various gifts; mostly orbs and tokens, not very sentimental things. From John, she received a bag of star stuff.
GodsWatch sent her a few pieces of gold. Oh, right, he had an abundance of that, she remembered. It meant nothing.
After the wedding, Jolie left the game browser and clicked play on the song, ‘Heather’, wishing that the wedding had been hers and GodsWatch’s.
Melancholic, she produced another poem:
“Return my heart”
You took my heart, didn’t you?
You bastard, did indeed
Now where’s my remedy?
Oh, I’d steal all the world’s hearts
If it meant the return of mine
And what could I do to erase this pain?
But all, it seems in vain
Because naught is a replacement
Not a filler for this void
My chest, it remains open
So look, observe the autopsy you’ve done
Alive, and still breathing
And my heart, it’s still beating
But in my chest remains it not
For in your hands, it’s resting caught
On her way to pole class, Jolie listened to another song she’d found. It spoke of love and dreams and wishes, of everything she wanted, with him… She listened on repeat, and instead of taking the bus, she walked. There was no need to hurry, no need to take the fast way.
Perhaps the same was the case with GodsWatch? He was 15 — had she forgotten that?
Why did she keep trying to rush things?
Of course he wouldn’t respond, whether he liked her or not.
The trees were green by now, but the leaves hadn’t appeared out of nowhere. They had slowly, but surely, sprouted from little buds, and then become the flourishing leaves they were now.
Her relationship with GodsWatch — if one existed — was but one of those buds, or maybe not even that. It was still early, not in the stage of blossoming just yet. But would it ever blossom?
What it worth trusting in a future blossoming, or ought she to let it go?
Hope wouldn’t let her, she knew that much. If her previous experience had taught her anything, it was to trust herself, and her intuition. Ignore the perceived facts or imagined obstacles. Trust and let it happen. Indeed, that’s what she was going to do.
A walk always brought about an improvement in moods, always a fresh breath. And on her quest, she had gained fresh motivation and strength.
It didn’t matter that she was married to RapidJustice — she could divorce him at any time, and marry GodsWatch. The world hadn’t ended, and there was still a future. For as long as she existed, there was the chance to change, and that she would. Not forcefully, but with a flow so gentle that even Zenflood wouldn’t be able to beat her. In taking time, she would be a champion, and she would win his heart … if that’s what he wanted, and if that’s what was meant to be.
No forcing — she was a river of patience, virtue and time, and she had the touch of a feather, so light that he wouldn’t feel when she embedded herself onto his heart. He wouldn’t be able to tell, until it was too late, and she had sunken in so deep that there was no way for him to get her out, without ripping his heart in pieces. Not even then, in fact, for she would be a part of it. Every piece of his heart would have her name on it; her very essence and her scent, inescapable.